Marriages are beautiful and made in heaven. We all were told that, right?
Nothing could be farther from the truth. Marriages are made in the minds of our parents for one of the following reasons:
- In fear that their child will begin dating or would have the freedom to hook up.
- To flaunt to their relatives, friends and neighbors how wealthy they are.
- To establish that their child is grown up and is moving to the next stage of life by everyone’s approval.
- To share 10 times filtered and photo-shopped pictures on Facebook.
- The last one is gender specific-
a) Men- so that a free, domestic servant for life can serve the family and the mother-in-law who had been taking care of the grown up son until now, can dump those responsibilities on the bride.
b)Women- afraid that she might get pregnant before marriage or elope or get ‘out of their hands’ in some way- taming women is tough so its better if the husband and his family members handle the reigns asap.
Someone in the back bench just yelled-
They want their child to be happy???????????
I disagree to this one because if they wanted their children to be happy, marriage is not license for happiness. More importantly if their happiness meant anything, they would let their children choose their life partners.
Before you judge me for being disrespectful, let me tell you that I’m happily single and independent and I’m where I’m because I don’t have an elder brother who can support my parents when the time comes. Neither my family has access to some benefits or pensions that can keep things running for them. My choice to establish a career and then think of marriage (if ever) is for the sake of my parents. Instead of marrying off like my sisters and cousins when they were 23, I decided to stay single and I’m proud of my decision.
If you really love your parents, you do not have to do whatever they spoon feed to you. Be a matured individual first ‘because you cannot pour from an empty cup’. To be able to say that you’re a great child, begin with
1-not pressuring them for dowry if you’re a woman.
As far as parents are concerned, Indian parenting seriously needs to be recycled. Beginning with Bollywood and terrible Ekta Kapoor serials where women are nothing but self sacrificing saints or devils-nothing in between. Please parents, re-consider your parenting and stop forcing your children to get married.
And yes, marriages are not made in heaven but in expensive 5 star hotels with the help of multi cuisine serving caterers and the likes. If they were made in heaven, no one would ever have gotten divorced. Let’s ditch those floozy ideas and live in the real world where unmarried couples sometimes without an official paper, survive hardships for decades and marriages consist of domestic violence, marital rape, dowry deaths and painful divorces.
There are good marriages as well where both the husband and wife share happy and balanced relationships. But if you cannot decide your own partner for life, I don’t think you’re matured enough to start a relationship because relationships need a lot of growing up, emotional maturity and compatibility.
Please share your thoughts and spread the message 🙂