To Dream Or Give Up- Mindy Project Just Got A Little Too Real

Can ambitious women ever have a good family life?

Last night’s episode of The Mindy Project got a little too surreal.

I’ve been a long time fan of the show and was always able to relate to the character of Mindy Lahiri in many ways.


After the glorious and fun dating phase ended, the show descended into the more serious and deeper problems of a matured, grown up couple.

Now its all about baby responsibilities and adjustments. While marriage is something Mindy always wanted, now that it’s happening… it’s taking a toll on her. 

Yes, its easy to say that now we live in a liberated society where career women exist and several cool companies like Netflix are making it ever more possible for parents to juggle work and family.

But I suppose, you reach in that stage once you find a guy who is willing to be half responsible for a baby. May be, it’s just me but I don’t know how many men in general are happy to clean up baby diapers while mommy is away? If you have one, you’re really fortunate. But I’m sure there aren’t many. At least not around me, so before you judge me to be sexist; just assume I’m unfortunate.

So what about the rest? Should we compromise and give up on our careers and dreams to stay home and make babies?

Or do we stay single and may be adopt or make one with a donor, as and when we might like?

More importantly, why wouldn’t men want to take half the responsibility of raising a child? I asked this question to few and most of them said “that’s what my father did. That’s how the grand father did. They never got involved with anything baby. It was all the mother’s job”. 

To that I said “your grandfather and father used to ride horses and donkeys, why are you driving cars then?”

As usual, the conversation pretty much either ends there or gets messy. You know that stage when someone know how stupid they sound and they have no logical reasonable explanation but they rather stick to their self illusions rather admit they need to change.

It’s all about convenience, isn’t it?

Just because it is convenient, you are driving a car and not riding a donkey like your grandfather.

But raising a baby is inconvenient. It needs patience, sleepless nights, hard work… so why don’t we use the same old tradition,woman’s place and all those bull shit excuses and simply don’t partake any role in parenting.

There are dads that I see who flaunt their fatherhood on social media profiles boldly. And it gives me hope… hope that not all fathers are too distant, too manly, too aloof to be dads, not just fathers.

My mother stayed at home by choice and father participated in raising us despite working. I guess when you live in another country away from your family then its only the two of you who have to be there. You cannot rely on your mother-in-law or sister-in-law to help out. Hence the dad has no excuse but to be there. That worked out greatly in our favor but dad has participated equally in raising my little brother even when things changed. He wakes my brother up, gets him ready for school, drops him, picks him, arranges his school things while mom helps with homework and other regular chores. And its perfect…


When Danny was giving Mindy a hard time for starting another business venture, she did her best to explain that the kid will not be neglected. And if Danny was so worried, why doesn’t he give up on his career and stay at home! That’s where most men falter, because they have no other excuse but the same old, I’m a man and I can’t stay home. Well, why should she?

I loved the movie The Intern starring Robert Di Nero and Anne Hathaway in which her husband is a stay at home dad despite being previously a super successful professional. Having a partner who understands your dreams and is willing to see you fly, is such a blessing.

The Mindy Project has been my super fav show and I’ll continue watching it but the problems are getting too serious and I really hope to see some good resolution of this career or home dilemma, the character is currently facing.


Die-hard fan of TMP 🙂


7 thoughts on “To Dream Or Give Up- Mindy Project Just Got A Little Too Real

  1. I dont watch the serial, so cant comment on that one. But, the traditional roles are slowly and surely changing. If the kids watch the parents doing it, they will do it too in future is what I believe. If a woman can earn a living, surely a man should be able to help with the children. After all, he is an equal partner. I just wish our popular serials show some of these realistic portrayals of life instead of all heavily bejewelled women in silk saris cooking in the kitchens in a palace.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I enjoyed what you had to say about the Mindy Project because I really love it too. But I will say, in ‘The Intern,’ Anne Hathaway’s fiance actually cheats on her because he felt his masculinity was threatened by staying home with their child. The roles between parents are certainly changing, but there is still a recurring theme of ‘maintaining masculinity.” But I too, hope that Mindy will stick up for herself and continue to pursue her dreams.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for sharing that Kierra.
      In the film The Intern though, the extra marital affair was something that happens in marriages…there are several films we have seen where the husband is a workaholic and the bored wife meets a stranger on the side. So I don’t see that as something he did because his masculinity was threatened but simply something that a bored, stay at home spouse often falls in the trap of.
      I do hope that more and more people, both men and women, embrace the change and raise kids a shared responsibility. And for Mindy, I’m guessing she and Danny are about to break up?!?!?
      There’s no other drama point left. Next episode is the grand finale, so I think they will break up, they have got to show that because the audience will hate them if they show that Mindy gave up on her dreams and became a stay at home mom. .. Don’t you think so?


  3. It’s interesting because a woman’s role has evolved so much for the last few decades but the traditional mentalities persist. Women are working and have careers but they aren’t treated as equals even in the workplace. In Canada (where I live) women make about 75-80% of what a man in their position would make. There are excuses of mensuration, pregnancy and maternal leave to justify paying women less but it just goes to show that the double standards persist. I’m lucky to say that most of my male friends would love to stay home with the child because they get paternal leave as well here. Hopefully the complete shifts happens with the next generation if not this one.

    Liked by 1 person

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