How Do Working Moms Make It Work? #THEMINDYPROJECT

Last week I did a post reviewing the latest episode of The Mindy Project about the conflicts that working mothers face.

Can ambitious women ever have a good family life?

This week the dilemma stretched when Danny completely misused Mindy’s easy going, non confrontational attitude and tried to get her pregnant against her will.

As a single woman, scared enough of the matrimonial commitment, the recent episodes of The Mindy Project kind of pushed me off the edge.

In the review posts on the internet many people have disliked the transition that this comedy show is now more like a drama and the issues are too real for a rom-com.

Many people have issues that the character of Danny is purposely demonized and looks unreal.

I think the character of Danny is actually very, very, very real and it might be hard for people to accept this. Our idea of a fictional world is on the extreme ends; either a couple is perfect or they aren’t and they break up. Specifically the characters…

In real life, personally I’ve seen people change from good and romantic to demanding and controlling. One of the guys that I dated, was the best boyfriend anyone can ask for. He was kind and gentle and caring.

He would send surprise gifts as were in a long term relationship, he would keep in constant touch throughout the 24 hours and he would be supportive of everything. He is the last person I thought, who could change.

Later we introduced our families and since then onwards, I could visibly see the difference in his attitude towards me. He very much wanted to marry me but everything was on his terms.

He constantly kept talking about ‘my family’ when I thought he and I were beginning a new family. There were rules and conditions and his conservative family values popped out of no where. His mother and I had nothing in common except that we both ate food so the only thing she would talk to me about was if I knew cooking and what I had eaten that day.

Marriage seemed more like a trap. I broke off. Hence the change in Danny’s behavior is very real. This is what happens in other domestic violence relationships as well.

Our typical couple is like where the man is hitting the woman all the time and she is physically aching with injuries. But when two people love each other, we discount the controlling part and see it as love or concern. But is it? Seriously?

Mindy and Danny are the perfect romantic couple who dated and fought and then got back together after years of knowing each other. We as audience can barely conceive the idea that this relationship could ever involve emotional and psychological abuse. But that’s what it is and that’s what millions of real life couples go through.

It’s not bad to want children and family. But it’s also not bad to want to pursue your career and dreams. Many people say that if both the husband and wife are in the same line of profession, it is easier for men to accept their working wives because they understand the priorities and work ethics. But in this case, both being OBGYN’s isn’t doing any good.

Not sure where The Mindy Project is heading but I really want to know from working moms, HOW DO YOU MAKE IT WORK? 

Is it because your husbands are extremely supportive and they do share half the chores of house and raising a kid?

Is it because you manage your time and chores so well, you do both outside and inside tasks tirelessly, sleeping less and cutting down me time?

Is it because you have a bunch of cool relatives or in laws that watch the kid, allowing you enough space to work?

Who does the nitty gritty and does it become a usual cause of conflict?

Is it something only rich women can do because others may not have the resources to spend on nannies and other facilities that make your life easy?

Please share your story with us and it will be published on this and other blogs. You can choose to remain anonymous if you like. Please email your story to khanlondon2012@gmail.com . Your story will help inspire a lot of women and men to be supportive of each others pursuits.

Can’t wait to hear from you.

Love,

Shahla

Advertisements